


Career Day

by SamuelJames



Category: How I Met Your Mother
Genre: AU, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-17
Updated: 2011-05-17
Packaged: 2017-10-19 12:05:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/200676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamuelJames/pseuds/SamuelJames
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barney has a career day for his kindergarten class.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Career Day

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Career Day  
> Pairing/Characters: Barney/Robin, Ted, Marshall/Lily  
> Rating: 15+  
> Summary: Barney has a career day for his kindergarten class.  
> Notes: Written for the comment_fic prompt HIMYM, Ensemble, Alternate careers AU - Barney holds career day for his kindergarten class.  
> Disclaimer: How I Met Your Mother is the property of its creators. No copyright infringement is intended.  
> Archiving Information: Please do not archive elsewhere on the net.

"Remember class to listen to all our guests talking. When they finish you can ask them questions."

One of the girls puts her hand up.

"Yes, Donna."

"Mr. Stinson, I already know what I want to be. I want to be a princess so can I just read my book?"

Barney shares a smile with Robin. "Well, Donna. This is Robin, when she was little she read lots of fairy-tales but when she left school she found out that being a princess doesn't pay very well and it's really hard to meet princes."

Robin interrupts. "It's true, Donna. They have security guards and big gates around their castles. I'm Robin Scherbatsky and Bar... I mean Mr. Stinson asked me here to talk about my job. I'm a Doctor. I had to work real hard at school and go to college for a long time. It's great to help sick people get better and I work late a lot but I love my job. Do any of you know any doctors?"

A couple of the kids put up their hands.

"A card something doctor helped my grandpa."

"A cardiologist. They look after people when they have heart problems."

One of the little girls waves her hand. "My daddy had a heart attack last year. Now mommy doesn't let him have anything nice."

One of the boys starts crying and Barney crouches down beside him. "What's wrong, Jack?"

"My grandpa died from a heart attack and they put him in a box." He stands up and points and Robin. "Why didn't you save him?"

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I didn't know him but sometimes doctors can't save everyone. We just try our best."

"That's stupid, you're stupid."

"Jack. That's not fair. Apologise to Doctor Scherbatsky."

"Sorry you're stupid."

"Okay, Jack, I know you miss your grandpa but you can't talk to our guests that way. Time out for you."

Jack goes and stands in the corner while his friends look mutinously at Robin. Barney ushers Robin towards the door and steps out into the corridor to talk to her. "I'm sorry about that. Kids can be rude sometimes."

"Don't be too hard on him, Barney. He's obviously still upset. It's my job and I still find dealing with death hard. I'm sorry it didn't go very well."

"It's okay. You were great, thanks for coming in. Ted will be here soon. I'll see you later."

"I'll be home late."

"As always." Barney kisses Robin quickly and goes back into his classroom.

Ted arrives about twenty minutes later and passes out cupcakes which keep the kids quiet while he talks. "Cooking is great. I love making dinner for my friends. You have to learn about different types of meat, sauces, vegetables, desserts and wines. Cakes are the most fun because you get to decorate them whatever way you want. Can you all draw me a picture of your favorite foods?"

Ted and Barney talk quietly while the kids draw.

"You're pretty good with them."

"Thanks. I was kind of nervous. I didn't want to bore them too much."

"The cakes were a great idea. Won them over straight away."

Marshall is running late so the kids laugh when he comes flying through the door. "Sorry, Barney, meeting took forever."

"It's Mr. Stinson in here."

A little boy puts his hand up.

"Yes."

"Did you bring us anything? Mr. Mosby brought cakes."

Marshall shakes his head. "I do have a poster for your classroom though. It's a dinosaur."

"There are no dinosaurs."

"Not any more but they lived millions of years ago. I work at a museum. Does anyone know what that is?"

"It's the boring place my mom takes us when it rains."

"Ashley!"

"Sorry, Mr. Stinson's friend."

Marshall gives Barney the poster to put up. "Ashley's kind of right. Some museums are boring. Like my wife loves art and I don't. Looking at art in a museum is really boring to me but to someone who loves art it's great. I love dinosaurs and like to find out what they might have looked like. We have skeletons in the museum. Lots of children like to look at our exhibits. The gift shop has dinosaur posters, puzzles and keyrings."

Marshall talks to the kids for a while and laughs when the kids ask if Barney is named after the purple dinosaur.

"No I am not and until you leave school I am Mr. Stinson, not Barney."

Marshall stays for Lily's presentation and of course the kids notice that. There's a ton of questions.

"Who's she?'"

"Why is she so small and you're so tall?"

"Do you kiss her? My daddies kiss sometimes."

"Is she the one who makes you look at art?"

Lily gives him a look at the last one.

"I'll explain later. Go ahead, honey."

"Hi kids, I'm Lily. When I was in kindergarten I loved animals and my favorite teddy, Mr. Bear, was my patient. I used to pretend he was sick and take care of him. Many years later I decided I wanted to be a vet and take care of real animals. It took a lot of work and I don't help any bears but I do get to look after lots of animals. Do any of you have a pet?"

Several of the children put up their hands and Lily lets them talk in turn about their pets. One of them talks about his dog being put down and Barney intervenes before there's any more crying. He asks them all to think of an animal that begins with the same letter as their first name. While the kids argue over whether birds count as animals Barney explains the situation to Lily. "It wasn't Robin's fault but I don't want all my kids going home talking about dead grandparents and dead dogs."

"Poor Robin."

"I know. Thanks for coming in though."

Marshall joins them. "Hey, Lily. Did you really want to be a vet when you were in kindergarten?"

Lily nods.

"I had no clue. I think I wanted to be a pilot or something."

"I can't even remember. I certainly didn't want to be a teacher. Weird how things turn out."

"Mr. Stinson."

"Yes, Ethan."

"Can we do our animal name game before we go home?"

"Sure, does everyone have one?"

One girl shakes her head and Lily offers to help. "What's your name?"

"Kayla."

"I can think of two from Australia. Does anyone know them?"

The kids just stare back and then one girl puts up her hand. "She can't have koala. That's my one."

Barney interrupts. "It's okay, Karen. I'll bet some of you picked the same one. Kayla you can have kangaroo."

"Thank you, Mr. Stinson."

They go around the room and of course there are some duplicates but it fills the time nicely. Marshall smiles as the kids talk about the animals they chose. Having a child with Lily seems like the scariest thing but it could be great too. They have all this ahead of them. He catches Lily's eye and smiles. She nods her head at Barney and Marshall shrugs as if to say, yeah I know. It's weird seeing Barney in a classroom setting. He's surprisingly good with the kids.

Later that night Robin wakes Barney when she climbs into bed.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay. It's not a school night." Barney puts his arms around her and kisses her forehead. He reaches out to switch on the bedside lamp. "Thanks for today. How was work?"

"Busy but good. How did everyone else do?"

"Well nobody else made them cry."

Robin feigns being upset.

"Ted brought cupcakes. I think he's their favorite."

"Damn, should have brought a bribe."

"You should have."

Robin tilts her head up to kiss Barney. She throws her leg across his and half lies on top of him.

"Not too tired?"

"Nope. I think you might need a thorough examination, Mr. Stinson."

"Yes, Doctor. There's definitely some swelling."

"It's very treatable."

Barney laughs. "Less porno quotes."

"Agreed."

Robin kisses Barney again and straddles him. She smiles when the light catches his wedding ring.

"Love you."

"Love you too, Robin."


End file.
